Dealing with bad emotions

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Anger, frustration, overwhelm.

Those are but a few of the emotions we most dread experiencing in our lives.

This can become especially noticeable when we are going through good times. When life feels joyful and the pieces of the puzzle seem like they’re coming together.

It’s in these moments when the thought of “Everything is going a bit too well” may cross our minds.

What follows immediately after is a rush of anxiety and panic as we consider how everything can suddenly collapse, leaving us in a place filled with the so-called dreaded emotions.

Now, as you probably know, nothing lasts forever.

On the bright side, this means that if you are on a downward spiral where everything seems to be against you, don’t despair. If you are willing to put the right effort everyday things will inevitably change for the better.

On the not-so-bright side, even if you do everything in your power to keep on an upward spiral: you go to the gym, you eat well, you dedicate yourself to your job, you even make the best effort you can to live according to your moral code… Even if you do all of this, sometimes life will throw a curveball at you.

Maybe you get injured at the gym, you start losing focus at your job, you argue with your girlfriend, and then, all of a sudden, you find yourself facing the emotions you struggled so much to run away from.

It’s hard, and recently it happened to me.

The business was going super well, all of my clients were super satisfied with the results we were achieving and the progress that was being made.

However, out of nowhere, 2 of the 10 I work with said they couldn’t keep paying for the mentoring so they had to stop.

Anger, frustration, overwhelm.

All of those came rushing back at me, and of course, all aspects of my life suffered from it. Not from what actually happened, but from my perception of it.

I knew I could get more clients and that all the others were very satisfied, however, this event made me question my own self-worth and indulge in these emotions.

Luckily, I was able to quickly deal with this obstacle and keep moving forward, closer to my goals. And that’s what I want to share with you right now.

How To Deal With “Bad” Emotions/Feelings

The first thing I did, or better said, avoided to do, was to repress whatever it is I was feeling.

For how painful, uncomfortable, and inconvenient these feelings can be, you must avoid the instinctual reaction to run away from them. Instead, you are going to sit with them, meditate on them, journal about them.

You are going to hear what these emotions are telling you and you will do your best, not to accept them, but to understand them.

As Carl Jung said:

“what you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.”

Once you give these feelings and emotions their time to tell you what they have to, a lot of times, they will go away. The solution will be made clear to you, allowing you to implement it without any attached undesired feelings.

Of course, even if the feelings go away that doesn't mean the problem is solved.

You still have to come up with a proper solution to not let go of the progress you’ve made up to this point. That is crucial.

However, until you are able to come to terms with what is going on inside you, to understand what these emotions are saying, you will never be able to reach the practical solution you need because you won’t be able to see reality for what it is.

As Marcus Aurelius said:

It doesn’t hurt me unless I interpret it’s happening as harmful to me. I can choose not to.

You also have this power within you. The power to chose how you deal with the turbulence happening inside.

But to be able to use it, you must first find stillness. You must be able to turn down the noise of social media and dopamine spikes so that you can hear what is going on inside you.

Only then will you find peace.

One More Thing…

If you would like to set your morning routine according to Marcus Aurelius, I have created something for you…

It is called “Marcus Aurelius Morning Routine”.

I took 4 practices that the emperor would have approved of (by following his texts) and how you can best apply them to your life!

Get It Here!

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Stoicism & Philosophy | Building @pathsofmeaning

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